Historie del 3// Right Here

"So basically my mom is drunk all the time, since my dad died three years ago. I don't really know what to do, she never listen! I miss my dad so much and all the good times we had together before.. we were a perfect family back then. I just miss my family, my mom isn't the same.." I said with tears in my eyes. "I can see that there is some more" Jake said calmly. I nodded slowly while taking away the tears from my cheek. "My mom calls me so many names.. and she.. she.. and I for that sake.." "You what?" I breathed out..

I just showed Jake my arms. Thats.. a huge step for me. It's a hufe thing for me. The scars are.. what should I say? They are just there.. kind of. I don't really know what to say. I looked over at Jake who hold my arm and he was spechless. He looked at me shocked, with tears in his eyes. "Please, don't say you still do this.." He said. I was scared to answer that, cause I haven't stopped.. not yet. It is hard to stop, harder than you think. It's an addiction, like drug.. It is hard to stop when you've first started.

Jake wrapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead. "I'm so sorry" he said. I dragget me out from he hug. "What?" I said shocked. "I'm sorry I wasn't here for yo-" "JAKE! Stop it! It was my decision, okay? It was and will never be your fault. How can you think like that? It was my decision to not tell you that." I said quick. He nodded slowly. "I just.. I should've seen it on you.." He said and I saw his eyes was tearing up. I hugged him tight, he is so sweet and caring. I hate it in class when people suddenly starts to talm about cutting and that it is such an EMO thing and all that stuff, I just hate it. I tear up everytime that happens. We had a kind of movie night with my hole class and we saw this movie, and the girl was in REHAB after she'd cut herself for months. People laughed at that girl and it was so horrible for me, sitting there, and no one knew what I was going trough. Not what I do daily or weekly. I try, I try the best that I can to stop it, stop doing what I'm doing, but it's hard, really hard. "Carina?" Jake looked over at me. "Hm?" "You said that your mother also.. I mean.. you said that you mom also did something.." Oh, he remembered... I knew I could trust Jake, it isn't that, but I'm really scared that they might.. oh, screw it! I showed him my bruces, that.. my mom had made. Jake teared up again. Poor thing.. i felt a bit bad for showing him all my scars and bruces, because it made him cry. "Jake..." "You are not going home to that women again, okey? I won't let you do that" he said. "Jake I have to.." I said calmly. "You don't have to do anything, she is abusing you!!" He raised his voice and teared up again. I felt like really bad now, for telling him I mean. "You know I have to, or I'll.. I just don't know" "Talk to Demi, ask her if you can join her on tour or something?" That was actually a good idea, just the fact that Demi doesnt know about my scars. "Demi doesnt know" "Then tell her, she is your cousin and your bestfriends, you should let her know, okay?" he said. I nodded. "I won't let you continue doing this"

We talked for hours, about everything actually, just normal things. Jake is such a sweetheart. I'm considering rehab for my self. "You are going home now?" Jake asked since we were on our way the his car, or his babe as I like to call it. "Yeah, I have to" I smiled, fake. "You don't have to do anything.. Is your mom home now?" He asked while grabbing my hand. "Yeah" "Well, we should get you home and you pack a bag or something and you move over to my house" he smiled. "Jake, I can't do that" I said. "Yes you can, we have a guest room you can sleep in. It is just two weeks left of school, you'll stay with me till then and then you'll go with Demi." he said sweet. "Thank you Jake" I said before i kissed his cheek. I saw he blushed a little, which was so cute. I love boys who blushes, cutest thing.


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